It is a entreaty to women to dress helpfully. It is well written, well thought out. I think some of us have discussed the topic before, in which case reading it is like reading your own thoughts. But very well organized ;-)
Anyway I just wanted to say that I *believe* it's important to dress helpfully but I may sometimes fail to do so. Ladies have an open invitation to pull me aside and say I might have missed the mark that day. No eloquent justification needed. If you simply feel uncomfortable having your husband witness me wearing whatever it is then that's good enough. If guys have an issue they can deliver the message anonymously through my husband or their wives.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA! I'm sorry Kim, the idea that you've ever dressed in anything close to the niehgborhood of innapropriate is just hilarious. I love and appreciate how the women in our Bible study always dress modestly, and was getting glad that I could post those sentiments here when I ready your statement. Really, none of you girls have to feel bad about poor choice in clothing, and I'll be sure to let you know if you deviate from the path of clothing you seem to have been on since the day I met all of you.
ReplyDeleteThanks for posting this Kim. As Matt said, this hasn't really been a problem and I doubt it will be, but I for one really appreciate you putting yourself out here for this kind of "constructive criticism". I feel truly honored. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteSo in the spirit of openness and inviting correction if necessary...What do the men in our group think of bra straps showing?
ReplyDeleteI ask because to me it isn't ideal, but neither is it a huge no-no, if done tastefully. To me "tastefully" means coordinating what I'm wearing both under and on top and not doing things like the black bra with a tight, white shirt.
I have some shirts I like but under which the straps just won't stay put. And of course there are spaghetti strap tanks...
Would it be most helpful to update my wardrobe?
I tend to be more strict when it comes to womens' fashion, and try to fend off becoming "legalistic," and I tend to be on the fairly-conservative-biblical side of the issue(i.e. I prefer that Stephanie doesn't braid her hair), with a more than full understanding of how the male mind tends to run things. I have a very lenient (yes I mean lenient) rule for our household that the collar of one's shirt shouldn't be more than 3 or so inches lower than the base of the neck, you know that little "v" shape. The idea being that I'm not comfortable with anyone see any part of my wife's breasts at all. No cleavage, no nothing. They're on a need-to-see basis, and you don't need-to-see. It's inevitable that a woman is going to have to bend down for some reason during the course of her day, and I don't want anyone "getting distracted" if you know what I'm saying.
ReplyDeleteThat being said, I think that "good looking" guys shouldn't go around like the cock-of-the-farm either. Like our old friend Matt Bex (remember him?) used to go around with his shirt off all the time, just because he had the body to do so... for me, modesty goes both ways.
As far as bra straps are concerned, if were getting specific; it's not the clothes that generally trouble me, it's the lack thereof, it's not what clothes are showing, it's what the clothes show. But I don't generally have a problem with the way the the ladies of WeNBiS dress.
-Scott
Scott, I like your rule for necks of shirts.
ReplyDeleteI myself have a problem with the way I react to how women dress (I am easily cued visually), and I am very thankful for the ones who dress conservatively. And for even the ones that do dress conservatively, I can STILL have a problem (conservative can also be cute, unfortunately). So I have learned of ways to deal with it. Namely looking down or away. I worked myself into this habit in college and I continue it today. Soon as I detect even an inkling of "interest" spark off in my head I just look away.